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May 26, 2022

Advice From The Mountain Top: How to Go About Your Wealth Building Journey w/ Mike Mccarthy

Advice From The Mountain Top: How to Go About Your Wealth Building Journey w/ Mike Mccarthy

Mike McCarthy is a husband, a father and a serial entrepreneur.  Over the past two decades, he is grateful to have played a major role in the growth and expansion of Keller Williams to become the #1 Real Estate Company in the world. As the Regional Operating Partner for the Greater Pennsylvania Region he is proud to lead 11,000+ real estate agents in over 50 locations closing Over 25 Billion in Real Estate Sales in 2021.

Mike is also the co-founder of the GoBundance Mastermind, Co-Author of The Tribe of Millionaires, The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families and the accompanying Family Playbook, a group Facilitator and Motivational Speaker. 



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Transcript
brian:

My McCarthy, what's going on. My man

mike:

doing great. How you doing?

brian:

Can't complain, man. I'll have an intro for you before we begin this. So people have a broad stroke and broad idea about your background and what you do with your business and you in general. But what I really want to hit on first is the concepts that you were speaking on. And the seven to eight conversation while we were in park city, Utah at the GoBundance event for people listening to seven to eight, we had Daniel Del reel and Aaron West on this show and they have. This show for GoBundance that helps entrepreneurs make the leap from seven figures to eight figures. And there's a lot of identity shifts and mindset shifts that need to be made. And we had Mr. McCarthy here hop on and give his absolute knowledge bombs and help us financially and philosophically. So I thought that the philosophical part would be even better to start with. So can you speak a little bit about your whole idea of operating from a place of light instead of dark?

mike:

Yeah, I'm sure. I think that, being a human being as a it's painful, there's a lot of challenges that are thrown at us. There's a lot of confusion. There's not really a meaning of life that gets explained to us. And we're just left here. In this world. And a lot of things happen that can can cause trauma. And I think what happens is that over time we learn how to convert that trauma into the wall that we build around ourselves in order to protect who we think we need to be in order to be loved or to belong. And so we build this wall, which we could call the ego and Dr. Kelly Flanagan and his book lovable explains this perfectly. So anyone who's listening that wants to dive deeper into this concept. That's where I got the metaphor from, but he just talks about how. We've built this, the castle walls and yes, it protects us, but it also keeps the best parts of us locked away sometimes. And so we've got to be really aware of that. He also talks about how we also then sit on our throne that we build within our castle, within our ego castle walls. And that throne is all the things. We're good at, or we do well, or that we Excel at and we tend to take all of those things and make them who we are. And we rest on that. And when COVID started Brian, I, I was stuck at home at first. I was happy for a little while. Cause I had been traveling so much. I'm like, this is nice to stay at home. Just do whatever. And for a couple of weeks We just enjoyed family time and did whatever. But after a few weeks I was like, man, I gotta, something has to come out of this. And so I started reading some books that were on trauma. One of them is called the trauma of everyday life. By Epstein. And I read that book and it basically just explained to me that no matter who you are, how great your life is, or, whether you had awesome parents or not, we all have these traumas that we carry around with us. And we use those traumas to build this wall and this throne that we sit on and that becomes how we show up in the world. And if we're not aware of that at some point we won't experience the true. Light and power that we have within us, which is not coming from a place of needing to protect or defend or close off to the world. But it's actually our true power. That's rooted in being able to say, you know what. I have this light inside of me and I'm going to authentically just let this power out into the world. And so it's been a, it's been a journey for me over, I have been working with coaches. I have three coaches currently. Dr. Kelly is one of them. I work with a woman named Janai lane and then I have another trauma. And mindset coach that I work with. Here I am having achieved a certain level of wealth and freedom in my life, but I'm doubling down and doing more work on myself than I ever have. And that's just because I realized that. The ambition that I had, where I was always chasing things and trying to prove that part of me while it was successful in creating material wealth and material success in this world, it also created a lot of unhappiness for me because every time I would arrive. At what I thought would be a place where I should be happy because of my accomplishments. I was always left feeling, feeling unfulfilled and maybe the opposite of what I expected to feel. And so being somebody who wants to enjoy every aspect of life, especially as hard as I've worked to create the life that I have it really was something that I needed to focus on so that I can reach a place of. Really operating from my true power, this place inside of me, these God given gifts and talents that I've had, and to allow those to flow into the world with a sense of openness and heart centeredness. And that, that really is the beauty of. What's come of my work over the last couple of years in COVID, as I've been able to really see who I was when I was a child where I didn't get maybe what I thought I needed or what I thought I deserved. And how I started to structure this person who was extremely ambitious, who could lead, who could jump out there and make things happen. And while always respect that part of me, there's a deeper part of me that I really wanted to get in touch with that. If I keep aligning with that. Part of myself, then I can truly live a spectacular life. And that's my word for this year is spectacular. I picked one word in, it felt a little funny, but it's only because that's my ego saying not my ego thinks it's funny because it doesn't believe that I deserve to have a spectacular life when you really boil it down. So I've got to get in touch with that part of myself. That's aligned. Our creator that lives in true abundance that, that actually does know that not only do I deserve that, but it's something that is my right to claim.

brian:

Lots of unpack there a lot to unpack there. I right. Everyone has been Mike McCarthy. Thanks for coming on, buddy. That's already enough value right there. All right. Before there's a couple of different directions. I want to take you from that. The fond spectacular for you right now. What does spectacular look like for you?

mike:

It's like majestic, beautiful, amazing. Grandiose was even one of the words I looked up the definition just to get in alignment, even with, in line with what your question is, and some of those words made me feel uncomfortable in a way where I was like, this is the right word for me, because it just means. Over the top. Amazing, really. And for me to find a place inside of myself that knows that I'm worthy of that. That's a task that I'm embarking on for the year.

brian:

So it was worthiness one of the main areas of your life that you felt wasn't spectacular. What areas were you really doubling down on to be able to come up with this whole consensus state perpetually of spectrum?

mike:

Yeah, I'm just allowing myself to, to have an enjoy what I've accomplished and the life that I've built without needing to add more onto it. So it's the act of. Not needing more in order to be better, more is not always better is better. And in this case for me it's knowing that I don't have to go build another business or go prove anything I've already done that. And what I need to do is really just find happiness, being a great dad. Being the owner of businesses where I have amazing people that, that really run with the ball. I very often I very infrequently get to touch the football, they're out there playing with it and running with it. And. My job is to support them, give them the resources to win and then shine the spotlight on them and not myself and be happy with that. Be happy with where our businesses and be happy with the spotlight that shining on these stars that are really just crushing it right now in the real estate world. And I'm okay. Operating somewhat in the background, right now it's a full contact sport and in real estate, it's competitive. So I'm still in the game, but I'm just allowing that. To be the star players in the game that we're playing right now. So it's all about just allowing myself to enjoy what I've art, what I already have and not some part of a part of my life that has been challenging because I'm always looking for the next thing, the next, the next business. The next thing that will help me to prove that I'm worthy or help me. To the world, to my father, to society, whoever it might be that I'm worthy of what I have already. And that's, it's kinda shitty because here we are as human beings chasing all this stuff down, man. If you finally catch what you want, make sure you take time to enjoy it and relish. And the fact that you did what you set out to do.

brian:

I love what you're saying, man. I, this is why I do the show. And, but you and I have spoken a couple of times, like our, ya I'd count you as a friend, man, but I would say being able to offer these perspectives is so valuable because where do you get this? You can't, you have everyone, that's a success in business. All they talk about as business, right? And we will talk business. We will talk dollars and cents in the back half of the show. And that's why we're going to have a premise before this people have an understanding of where you are economically and where you are in the business world before you say all these things. But these perspectives are so wild because a lot of people that are on the. They think that there's going to be this mountaintop, happiness. And I'm so blessed to be around guys like you because you guys have taught me especially you and Tim have taught me to love the hunt instead of the end result and the kill and enjoy the ride and enjoy the journey. 'cause before I was destined to do exactly what you were doing, chase, get to the mountain top. All of a sudden you shit. Another mountain, shit, another mountain, shit. Other mountain, going back. This was a conversation that was in the audience. While you were talking about this on stage, do you think that it was worth it going through what you went through with the Eagle? With the drive for the mountain top. Do you think it was worth it operating from that chip on your shoulder monkey on your back mentality to be able to get to your levels of wealth that you're at today, and then look at the intrinsic values of happiness and success and worth and spectacular, or would you go back to that 20, 30 year old, like Mike and say, Hey. Quit this shit. There's a better way to do it.

mike:

Yeah, what a great question. Number one, I would say I wouldn't change my journey for anything just because I've learned to accept and to love all parts of myself, including mistakes. I've made things I've done. And so there's no changing it for me. I love it. I embrace it. It is what it is. And so I'll say that first. And then the other thing I would say is that, the funny thing is that I realized now looking back that I didn't have to do it from that place. To all, to everybody out there that says, no, I have to operate with this chip on my shoulder. This need to prove this. Driven ambition. That's all great. There's nothing wrong with that actually, because that's natural, but I think it's the point in time when we awakened and we realized. Oh my God. I actually don't need to do it that way, because when we're on the hunt and we're hustling or grinding, we're doing everything we can to be successful. The 80 20 principle still applies like 80% of the shit you're you do that you think you need to do to be successful, doesn't have any impact. It only impacts 20% of your results. So you've got to get really clear on like, how can I. Really discern what the 20% is that if I focused on those activities, it's going to yield me 80% of my results. This is a little parade as law. And I think in retrospect, I realized that I spent a lot of time chasing down leads and climbing trees and mountain, top mountains and doing things that I thought was productive at the time. But now when I look back, I'm like, oh, there was only these few things that I actually had to do. In order to be successful. And all the other stuff that I did was just me just sitting there, spinning my wheels. So the reason I stayed that though is because. The more you're aligned with your true power, that abundance that lives within you and all around us, our creator, the universe, nature, whatever you want to call it, the more aligned we are with that force, then the more powerful we are and the better we are at discerning what action should be taken and what actions should not be taken. And so I realize and reflect back. I did it that way and yes, I wouldn't change it for anything, but now I know that I didn't have to do it that way. I could have embraced at a deeper level, my true essence and being, and I could have from that place, decided what I would do or not do and not been always running from or towards something. I could simply just be acting in alignment with my spirit and my human mission that I'm here. To live and to perpetuate so that, my family eventually I kids eventually can go on that same journey themselves. It's a bit of a double-edged sword there. It's I didn't need to do it, but I'm grateful I did, because if you don't go through that struggle either, you don't know that there's a light side of you that's aligned with nature. That is way more powerful. Then that dark side of you, that's trying to prove and is acting from a sense of not being loved or not being enough. And I think we have to really embrace the fact that other side of ourselves. Is capable of being infinitely more powerful and as in is connected to everything that is, was, or ever could be. And so there's this deep wisdom that we have access to, but we generally don't have access to it when we are acting from ego and we're driven to prove, or we're trying to be right and show, show that we're worthy of love. Woo.

brian:

All right. Couple observations there. So first off to summarize what you said and part the two phrases are popping out at me. One is contrast creates clarity, right? So you said that because you went through it's like you went through the valley, so you were able to see the other side because you went through the dark parts, another phrase that kind of sticks. Is, I feel like I'm trying to remember who the heck just told me it was something if someone recent, but they said there's three sides to a coin there's heads tails. And there's the edge in the middle to where you could see both sides of. And I feel like that's is that where you're talking about operating from is that edge, or maybe in Tony Robins terms, a peak state, is that what you're talking about and being in your purpose and being in your passion? Because a lot of people are listening to this right now, and maybe they're in the six figure mark, maybe in their seven figure mark. They haven't that don't, they don't have this feeling of arrival and there they need more than need more. My concern. And I'm speaking for me too. Selfishly is if you get to a point where you're like, is any of this even really worth it, then do you, is all of your ambition gone? Is all of your drive gone? It's all of the things that you. Relate with and identify as an entrepreneur, are all those gone, if you don't have that desire and that need for more, does that make sense?

mike:

It's the age old question that many people ask when they begin to meditate or journal or start to do the deeper work is and you always hear if we let go, that's a good thing. You start to learn these kind of more spiritual lessons. And I think that those are necessary. Lessons for us to realize that, we are all. So powerful, the human brain is capable of so much. You have so many people on this planet that show you what's truly possible. And so I think you just have to align with your. In a way where you build awareness because the key is not to never be an ego again, because also if in the ego, a couple of times today, before I go to bed, still the question, the real question is how quickly can I realize I'm acting from ego, which is probably a place where my heart is more closed. I think I'm right. I know it's going on. I might be hyper aggressive. I'm just trying to get to the result and that place for me to go there. At least I have to close my heart up and start operating from my ego in my mind. And sometimes we can get carried away with that. So you have to be able to stand in all of that and be aware like, am I, is my heart open right now? Am I acting from. My higher self or from my ego. And if you can really discern that, then what happens, Brian? And this is the key is now my ego is a tool that I can tap into that when I need it. If I need to hustle, I needed to grind. I need to get back to. The being a visionary and then making things come to life, then I can do that at any time. And I can access a little bit of ego if I have to do that. And that's okay. But in that scenario, Brian, my ego is a tool that I'm using. It's not something that I've lost myself inside of. And so we have to be able to know when we are operating from ego and then no. Hey, is this okay? Am I actually consciously choosing the actions I'm taking right now or is something else driving me? That's deeper. My wounding, my trauma, my need to prove my need to be loved my need to bull my need to be. Because it's okay. If that is what's driving you, but you'll be more powerful if you're aware of it. And then also if you can shut it off when you don't need it. So I did a lot of work with a coach probably a decade ago, and we named my ego, the Terminator. And the Terminator would be the one that is not low key is not easy going, is it has to be this way. We're going to get it done right now. This is the only way. And it's much like a wrecking ball that is Arnold Schwartzenegger in these movies. And that, I might get to where I want to go, but what's the damage created on the way there. Is, and if I lose myself, In that then I can create a lot of damage. Will I reach the intended goal? Yeah. There's a pretty good chance I will, but at what cost. And so we've got to get in touch with, what is the cost of operating from our ego? And can I shut it off? Because today what I like to say when my Terminator pops up and is like you got to do this, like it's gotta be this way then I can S I can sometimes gain control over my self and say, thank you, Terminator. You've always jumped in and tried to do what needed to be done, and we'll go to great lengths to crush anything in your way. But I don't need you right now. I got this. I can handle this without going into Terminator mode. So that's the metaphor I would use to just describe that as you've got it's all rooted in the awareness of whether you're at, when you're acting from that ego or not though.

brian:

So while you were talking, I was writing down a sentence, like a phrase that came to mind to summarize what you just said and the sentence I wrote. It all comes down to a game of using your ego and not letting your ego use you. Yeah. Okay. I love that. So instead of having ego be here, default blind mechanism, it's almost reminding me, have you seen those Behnam movies? Like the Marvel character. Yeah. It's almost like that. Isn't it to where it's now it's instead of just like this all consuming alien thing that's taken over you and just like black and you out and making you bite chickens heads off, it's something that he can bring up whenever he needs it. It needs to go save the day. He can throw that, flip, that switch, and he's just gone. So that's before we get into, before we get into some economics here let's hit on speak to hell. Speak to me, use me as the archetype 27, talk to the 27 to maybe 33 year old person. That's had success. They've reached a couple of the first mountain tops. Maybe they have young kids. They're just now starting a family. They are very much so in that. How does, what advice would you give to that person about how to access and control that ego and how to operate from this state that you're talking about now today, instead of having to go through all the pain and go through 10 years of coaching,

mike:

yeah number one is you got to get around people who will reflect back to you, who listened to this podcast, listen to the podcast. But honestly, you've got to have people that can reflect that back to you. I don't believe. This is I don't believe that there's a self-made person, period. I think we all have help. We all have people that take a stand for our greatness or reflect back to us who we are, or maybe even doubt us. And not that fuels us in some way. But I think you've got to have, the right mindset of Hey, I'm here to grow my job as a human being. Yes, I have a purpose and maybe that's related to a business where I'm helping people buy and sell homes or I'm investing in real estate or whatever it might be. But at the end of the day, we're human beings and our purpose is much deeper than that. I believe that this is the schoolroom of all schoolrooms planet earth. And I think we come here, we choose to come here in order to learn in order to grow in order to evolve. Our understanding of what it means to be a human being that is also an infinite spirit. If you believe in, in, our connection to spirit in the universe and all that which I do, then you realize that, my job, my career, the businesses I build, they're all just parts of. Of the tools that are laid out in front of me that are helping me to evolve into the best person that, that I can be and in the best soul that I can be. And so I think you've got to, number one, you can do a lot of practical things. If you're not, if you're on the grind and the hustle, but you're not journaling every day and reflecting on deep, meaningful questions about life and gratitude and why we're here. You know what your own ego and trauma and all of that is if you're not reflecting deeply and you're not meditating on these things, and you're not visualizing your stuff evolving. As a human being, then I think you're missing the point because building businesses is not what life is all about it, is it fun? And is it meaningful? Absolutely. But at the end of the day, the thing that matters most is, your connection to other people, your family nobody gets to the end of their life and they're like, I just wish I would've worked more and built more businesses. They're often, like why did I do that? I wasted an extra fee. I wasted the whole latter part of my life, still building a business. And you have to also, if you're leading a business right now, you have to ask yourself, are you the best person? To lead that business. You might be the a hundred percent owner of that business, but are you the best person to be leading that business? And I have some bad news for many of you out there is that you are not for every single person on this planet. That's ever started a business. There's somebody out there who will be better at running that business than you are. And so if you're getting a lot of satisfaction and significance from running your business and you're spending time away from your family, When you could hire somebody, who's going to do an even better job than you are, and your job would then be. Support that person, and then maybe work half or 25% of the hours that you're currently working, then how would that impact your family life and your ability to enjoy your life and what you've created? And the funny thing is Brian is that as soon as you accept the fact that there's someone out there that can probably run your business better than you can. The sooner you are the closer you are to finding that person and having a level of freedom in your life that you never dreamed possible. And now you're freed up to be somebody who's here to grow as a spiritual being, having a human experience. And you can focus in on that and it might involve launching other businesses. Contributing more to your community, enjoying life, more, just being a better husband, father, son, brother, uncle, whatever it might be. But oftentimes, unfortunately, entrepreneurs get so busy with the business that gives them significance that no one sees them again. And when they do see them again, they're on their phones. They're always having to be busy because that's where they're getting this sense of accomplishment from. And unfortunately at the end of their lives they're not gonna, they're gonna wish, I believe they're gonna wish that they had spent more time just living the life that they wanted to live instead of trying to, hustle and grind their way to the next dollar or next million dollars, whatever it might be.

brian:

Oh God. A lot of bombs. They're right up. Oh, my God. That was, thank you for all that, you offer a perspective that many can't because the level you've gotten to, so you can talk it's I feel like you're it's like you're up on Everest, yelling down to the other mountains. You're like, Hey guys, there's a better way. There's a better way up here. It's a better way to do it. There's a trolley

mike:

across the Ridge to take

brian:

that, but let's go back into your story. And so we can provide some colors. So now people have a framework about your story. You talked a lot about trauma, about your. Let's go back a bit and color in between the lines here and paint this picture about starting up in business, your relationship with your father, where this pole you go even began and where the Terminator kind of came into play here.

mike:

Yeah I graduated college thinking, the last thing I would ever do is wanna, is, want to go work with my dad. And yet I saw the opportunity in real estate and got my license and I thought, oh, I'll just go work for him. Part-time until I get some sales popping. And then I'll, I'll pursue my career that way. And then I started looking at the opportunity that my dad had just received from Keller Williams to develop the Pennsylvania and New Jersey and Delaware region for the. And I started plotting out territories and looking at numbers and I saw all of the sudden that this was actually a massive opportunity. And so I decided to move from Colorado out to Pennsylvania and take on growing that region. Full-time so all I did for the first two to three years really is just prospect and cold call. Top real estate agents and then get them to come and meet with me. And oftentimes when I would meet with them, they would be like, who like really, oh my gosh, like that their drug, their jaw would drop a lot of times in the initial meeting because they didn't expect a 22 year old kid to be the person sitting across from him saying, I have a life changing opportunity for you. And yet I was still able to connect. Many people that join Keller Williams and start these franchises. And, after my dad realized that I was getting after it, I really was passionate about this. And I was also getting the results that I needed. My dad started to slowly. Me take the reins of everything. And I'm really blessed that he did that. And also he's very blessed that he did that because he got to retire early and go live his life. He got to stop chasing. And like we've talked about and start living and start enjoying what he had created. And then I just got busy building the business and I was the youngest art, regional director and all of Keller Williams at the time when I started. And I also became the youngest regional owner when I officially took over . And so I was always a late bloomer. And now here I am way ahead of the pack in a lot of ways. And it was beautiful because I was at the ground level. Of something that eventually would become the number one real estate company in the world. Then I got to watch how that would work and be a part of growing that and see it all come together. And it, it's priceless. We could spend hours and hours just talking about all of the business lessons and what I've learned from Gary Keller and all of them, all of my mentors, my father, Bob Mechlinski, David Osborne, all of these guys that I'm in gals too, that just taught me. How to be a business leader, how to think like a business person and how to actually go out and create a vision that people are inspired by and have them join forces with you in that vision. And, it was an amazing opportunity. I feel I'm really blessed to have that opportunity. And a lot of the reasons why. I do a lot of the work I do with families and entrepreneurs who are parents is because being a second generation entrepreneur, I realized that, my kids are going to have quite the burden on their hands. And a lot of people would say what burden, like they have this opportunity to, inherit or have access to a lot of wealth and know. That's could be a really scary thing if you don't know what you're doing. And so I'm really passionate about families and about, about the real estate business as well, because it is in a lot of ways for people as it is a family business. And you see a lot of that husband and wife teams, fathers, sons, mothers, daughters, getting into this business. And I think we have to take a stand for, Being the best that we can be not only in business, but also. In our lives and Keller Williams is second to none with that because they really work on and look at the whole person and their life and their mission and what they truly want. And then real estate just becomes a vehicle to get there. And so I've really become a good student of that and I've applied all the things I've learned and it led me to where I am today. Not only do I have the Keller Williams business, I'm a co-founder with GoBundance, which is also a huge business. And I have the luxury of being an operator and being the leader of both of these businesses at one point. But then I had to take the ego blow and. Step out of the role and hire the people who could do an even better job running these businesses that than I could. And that's a big time ego blow because anytime you do that, people come in and they tell you to your face, man, they're doing such a good job. Like it's so much better now. And you're like, thanks. You really are. You're like, thanks. And you mean it, but it's also yeah. That's why I replaced myself because there's always somebody better out there that can do it.

, brian:

so you said that you were working pretty close with Gary and he was helping mentor you and coach you, as things were going. What were some of your main takeaways from talking to someone like that? That's birthing this huge. This is gonna be a multi-generational company. Yeah,

mike:

The number one thing I learned from Gary is to think really big and then take small steps towards whatever it is that you want and to really dial in and focus on that. His thing, like I said earlier, you got to get really clear on, what's your 20%, what are the things that are going to really move the needle and then really. Yeah, get really small on those details that matter most and nail them. And then eventually you're going to be able to have this huge opportunity as long as you can think that big. And part of that also is that if you don't think big, if your vision isn't really big, you can't hire people to fit inside of that vision. If they also have a big vision. So you've got to have a big enough vision. To where it allows other people's big visions to still fit inside of your own. And that's what Gary did is, it could have just been a regional company. It could've just been a local company to Austin and he could have stopped there and thought, oh, this is great. But he, his vision was always to be a worldwide company. And he knew that for him to attract the highest level of talent, he would need to have a vision that was big enough to include all these other great people that he's brought along for the journey.

brian:

Do you think that's something that could be trained or is that just something that you're born with?

mike:

I think any, almost anything can be trained, so I would start there, but some people might be a little more natural at thinking big. Maybe it's a little less scary to some people, or it comes a little more naturally to some, but at the end of the day, I think the more we get in touch with that power that we spoke of earlier, that's coming from our higher self that's rooted in the deep infinite wisdom. That is nature. If we're aligned with that, it's only going to want the biggest for us. So if you can't think big and you're not in a place where you imagine yourself, Being able to have a vision or a business that's that big. It might be just because you're blocked by your ego. We talked a lot about some can move you forward, but there's a lot of people whose ego doesn't manifest in the form of ambition. It actually. Manifests in the form of, I am not worthy. And so I won't take any action because what's the point I'm not even worthy. I don't feel worthy. And so they shut down and go the other direction. So it works in both ways. If I had to pick, I'd rather have the ego that has the ambition that's driving me forward. And so if you're out there and you're listening and you're stuck in a little bit of fear, you don't think it's possible. Just know that. The same part of the ego we talked about earlier, and you don't have to listen to it. Your creator wants you to have the most abundant life possible. And that means big in my in my, in the way that I see it for other people that might not be big too. So

brian:

well, here's the reframe work that I've done. I don't know if it's right or wrong, but it just is. And my reframework is that. Either good people are going to have massive levels of impact in this world and massive levels of wealth, abundance of power resources, call it resources either good people are going to have that or bad people are going to have that. I know I'm a good person. So I've changed my framework to if I can be, if I can be able to be a shepherd of. And almost a funnel of that abundance into the world at large. That's a win for the good guys, because if you're not doing that and you don't step up to the plate, the guys with the greed will 10 times out of 10, and then we get overran. Do you have anybody that you can think of maybe that, personally or any examples that you can think of people that kind of did things the right way? The only one that I can think of and like across their journey, like they got this concept early on and then applied it as they were going up. The only person I can think of would be Tony Robbins, but then again, he also had the masochistic ego part of himself in his twenties and thirties. Do you have any examples that you can think of that? Or we just human bro, maybe

mike:

Jesus Buddha. Like I don't, I mean deal. Yeah. I don't think anybody escapes this ego part of ourselves and in dealing with it, there might just be people. Are able to get to arrive to this clarity sooner and maybe start to, to still operate out of ego, but be more aware of it and minimize it wherever necessary. But I think you got to really stand on that side of the coin and look down on both sides in order to see the full picture. I think it'd be hard to, it'd be hard to just be someone with no ego that. Is getting it and moving forward without having been engulfed and overcome by, or you go at times because that's what really brings you back to man. What's going on. This is painful. It doesn't feel right. I'm not fulfilled. It's that pain. I think that eventually leads us to a better place. If we're willing to really embrace that pain and feel it and investigate maybe where it's coming from and then say, Hey, I love all parts of myself, including my ego. Now let me move forward in harmony with my ego. Not being just driven unconsciously by that Diego.

brian:

Yeah. And then that goes back to controlling it and not letting it control you. Okay. We've gone down the rabbit hole. We have gone down the rabbit hole, man, this one's fun. This one's fun for me because this is, this has been a good back and forth today. And not, I'd say most podcasts can't really do this. Like I think it would have either gotten brought back up to the surface or it's just, I love having these conversations, man. This is, this was a really fun one. Maybe let's end with some pieces of advice in general. To people that are still on the hunt, let's go back to them. And besides using your ego as a tool, not letting it use you playing a team sport, like David Osborne said and your mannerisms and everything go along with his now y'all are all coming, becoming one person at this point, man, I can see y'all rubbing off on each other, but going from the I dude, do the, we do to the Vedo and then having. There are some other pieces of advice you can give to people that are still in the hunt?

mike:

The first thing would be is make sure you're carving out the time that you need for yourself so that you can be the healthiest version of yourself. And that means physical health, emotional health, spiritual health. And that means. Doing the things you love, making sure you have time for those, and also doing the things that you might not love, you need to in order to take care of yourself. So the working out. Eating right. Meditating, don't forget those things because ultimately like your level of success is going to be determined by your level of personal growth. And so you've got to focus in on your own personal growth first, and it's also what earns you the right to lead other people. If you don't focus on growing yourself and being the best version of yourself, which I would call self-leadership. And you can't lead yourself, then who can you lead? Nobody's going to follow anyone who can't lead themselves at a high level. And so you've got to be that example of growth and development for your organization, for your clients, for your business, because that's going to really determine what level of success you're able to accomplish. Secondarily, I would say once you get really good at leading yourself, and if you have a family, especially kids at home and a spouse, then secondarily, you need to make sure you're showing up for them fully. And so ask yourself like how engaged and how present. Are you truly with your family and probably most importantly, how intentional are you with your family? Because if you're a leader, but you don't show up and be a leader at home, you don't have family meetings, you don't set goals as a family. You don't have routines for bed time and morning time that the whole family is designing and developing together collectively. Then you're not really doing your family any type of justice in how important they are to you. And then also you're probably building a legacy. A lot of entrepreneurs will use that as their catch phrase. Like I'm doing it for the family, I'm building a legacy but don't use your family as the excuse to be away from your family. Make sure that you're showing up fully. For your family, because your kids are only going to learn how to carry your legacy forward. If they're actually involved with you in a manner of which they can see your leadership and how it shows up, and they need to see you model that. So we need to be treating our family like a team, a high functioning team, and then actually doing the same type of activities that we would for a team within our family. And it doesn't mean that you're the dictator by the. The best types of leaders are gonna allow our spouse and our kids to also take the lead at times and listen to them proposed great questions that are meaningful, and then everybody answers them, including you. And so there shouldn't be as much of a hierarchy. I believe in leadership in general and certainly in the home, you've got to watch out how that leadership shows up. And I only say that as a cautionary tale, because I don't want entrepreneurs going, oh, I just heard this podcast. I'm going to go home and I'm going to get a family meeting go, and we're going to start setting family goals together. And they come in and they're just over the top where they spoil it for everybody. And they're like, oh man, dad's on one of his trips again, this'll go away soon and let me, let's just humor him. And then you don't get a real level of participation, but if they actually believe that you're interested in helping them hit their goals and get what they want and create the future, that they really dream of this, including spouse or. Now all of a sudden they might be open your leadership and open to implementing some of these. And my wife and I created a playbook, a workbook, if you will. That has eight exercises in it that families can do. And we wrote this playbook along with Hal rod. And so it's called the miracle morning for parents and families. There is a book that explains a lot about the miracle morning and doing it with your families, but there's an accompanying playbook. That teaches eight other exercises that you can do with the family that will help you to bring powerful, intentional leadership into the home. And so anybody who's listening, if you go to miracle morning.com/pdf playbook, you can actually get two of the exercises to download for free to give them a shot at home and see how it goes. But, I'm really passionate about this. So I'd be remissed if I didn't mention it, but I just really want people. To show up for themselves fully because you're worth it and then show up fully for your family because they're worth it. After you've done that. Now you'll be one of the most powerful business people, salespeople, entrepreneurs that you can be, and you'll live, earn the right to go and create great success. And you'll be doing it along with your family instead of in spite of them.

brian:

Us there's no more that you can't have a better closing line than that. And I completely forgot about that about the miracle morning, man that you were in the author series. That's fantastic. So yeah, we will have that link in the show description. Mike, if anyone were looking for more information or one of the reach out to you, where would you best record?

mike:

So my websites go, Mike mccarthy.com. So if you want to get ahold of me, that's the place to do it. And yeah, other than that checkout tribe of millionaires.com, if you'd like to tap into some of our free resources for that book or gobundance.com, if you're interested in hearing more about our travel industry, you've mentioned GoBundance a couple of times on your podcasts in the past. But yeah, tap into these places and these resources, and then go get to.

brian:

Love it. This has been Mike McCarthy, not the Terminator and Lubin with the action Academy's podcast signing off.